Thursday, April 17, 2014

Was Adolf Hitler lopsided, a/k/a one grape short?

By Mona Goldwater, European Affairs Ed.





An account by a German army medic confirms what the world long suspected: Hitler was lopsided, or, one grape short.  War vet Johan Jambor revealed the secret to a priest in the '60s.  The Priest wrote it down, according to The Sun, and his account surfaced 23 years after Jambor's death.

This seems to confirm an alleged Soviet autopsy on Hitler's remains made shortly after the war claimed Hitler was short one testicle. Most historians dismiss this reference as Commie propaganda.

Records do show Hitler was wounded in the groin in 1916 during the Battle of the Somme, and 
The Fuhrer's missing testicle has been mocked for years in a British song:


Hitler has only got one ball,
The other is on the kitchen wall,
His mother, the dirty bugger,
Chopped it off when he was small. 

She threw it over Germany,
It landed in the deep blue sea,
The fishes got out their dishes,
And had scallops and bollocks for tea. 

Frankfurt has only one beer hall,
Stuttgart, die München all on call,
Munich, vee lift our tunich,
To show vee "Cherman" have no balls at all.
 

Until then, there was never actually proof Hitler was asymmetrical Down There. The priest wrote that Jambor saw the evidence with his own eyes. Johan Jambor's friend Blassius Hanczuch confirmed that the medic had indeed saved Hitler’s life in 1916, but alas not the missing ball.
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